why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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