oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
