i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
