He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
