That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
