I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
