Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I enjoy the company of your penis
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
