it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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