Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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