Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
