I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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