I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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