I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
