Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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