You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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