FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize