Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
