I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
