he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
