we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
