Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize