They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
