Are we in a gay sports bar?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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