There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize