No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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