girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize