Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
