Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
