do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
