he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
