Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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