hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
We're too hungover to prance.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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