I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
