It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
