Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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