check it out our google latitudes are spooning
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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