first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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