My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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