porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
