in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize