I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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