Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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