Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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