its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
