I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
