Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
