I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
