therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
