the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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