i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
