she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Semen is not good for contacts.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize